A second date, would you like a hot chocolate with that?

Well, the hot chocolate movie guy (HCM) Guy, we went out on a second date last friday.
It could potentially have been a disaster as we had arranged to met in Sale St a bar in the CBD which is sort of halfway between our respective homes. Traffic was abysmal, I called him at one point to say I was still at least an hour from the venue, he said it was fine his ex was caught in traffic and hadnt picked the kids up yet anyway.
45 mins later he called to say the kids were still there and it looked like he was going to be very very late what did I want to do? I figured I am on the motorway so may as well head up closer to his place and meet somewhere up that way. He felt bad about me driving all that way but sounded pleased I hadnt suggested we call off the date.
So we met at GPK on the North Shore, nice place, I sat in the bar by the fire while I waited for 'HCM guy' to arrive. Half a glass of red later he walked in the door scanning the room anxiously [ I think he was worried I might have given up and gone home]. So we enjoyed another glass of red...this guy used to work in the wine business so he knows his stuff and doesnt skimp on wine. Anyhoo during the course of this glass and conversation in bounced his houseguest, a friend relocating from down south due to work. We shared woodfired Pizza and a bottle of very expensive red wine and then the friend left and we continued conversation and finished off the wine.
The time had come.........I was making noises about heading home and 'HCM guy' invited me back to his for a hot chocolate, now I know this all sounds a bit dodgy but it really is not.
I followed him back to his place wondering if maybe I should be doing this but then thought FFS I am 44 years old I am sure this will be fine, and it was, his house guest made himself scarce when we got there and HCM guy made us both a hot chocolate and we sat and watched part of a movie while we drank and talked a bit more.
Ok by 11.45pm I was starting to fade after having a busy day and what was over a 2 hour drive in totally crap traffic to get to the date earlier in the evening, topped off with a couple of 3 glasses of very nice wine, it was time to leave. So I did. I put on my coat, thanked him for a lovely evening and for dinner and the hot chocolate. I got a split second kiss, the kind that if you blink you will miss it and off I drove into the night with the instruction to text when I had arrived home safely. It took me 40 mins to get home which is about right.
Turns out [in a later text] he wanted to give me a proper kiss good night but had a sore throat and didnt want to share his bug. So two dates down and "the kiss" hasnt happened but that is not a bad thing because after leaping in boots and all with the last boy I am more than a little cautious this time. Once bitten twice shy and all and I am happy just to hang out and get to know this guy first before I open any shutters on the butterflies.
It did make me feel good the other night when he rang and asked when he could see me again and could he cook me dinner this friday.
He cooks, his house is tidy, he is intelligent, he laughs out loud, he is positive, he is driven, and he has a sense of humour and most of all he seems happy to go at my pace.
This could be the start of something good.

Now I have a question to ask.
With things seemingly progressing along with HCM movie guy, do I continue to date other men until something happens or something is said about exclusiveness or is that a bit 'on the nose' Part of me says no I shouldnt I should be concentrating on only HCM guy, but part of me says if it all falls over and things stop progressing I havent cut off other possibilities if I continue to see others. What would your take on it be?

And the beat goes on.

Ok Bachelor number three turned out to be about 15 years older than his photo , with it seems no sense of humour which one does definately need to associate with me. Crossed off the list. Met another one for coffee...yeah nah!

Are my standards too high maybe I wonder? No I dont think so.

Last weekend must have been the weekend for catching up with ex's. I dont have a lot of them but a couple I have remained friends with after we have parted company.

Last weekend I caught up with one I havent seen for about 6 years for a drink on friday night, he hasnt changed. He is still a madman with hair longer than mine and by that I mean its down past his waist. Hair a girl would kill for. I dont date guys with hair longer than mine I decided back then and since friday have reiterated that statement to myself.

Saturday I had a couple of offers but decided to put a pot of mulled wine on the fire and stay in and watch the James Bond Movie instead. It was cold out and I wanted to be lazy.

Sunday I had brunch with another ex whom I was very very enamoured of when we were together but sadly his drinking created problems for us me not being such a big drinker and him being an every night drinker. We catch up regularly and I still look at him and think about the great times we had when he was sober, We spent a lot of time out on our motor bikes touring here and there for lunch and coffee and coastal rides etc and many hours debating current affairs and watching the history channel on sky tv. Nerdy I know but he was one I could really get into discussions with, we were on the same page a lot of the time.

Sunday After brunch I spent in my vege garden its huge and picked Cauli, brocolli, beets, spinach, silverbeet, and Kholrabi for dinner that night which was very yummy and I so love my veges but alas I wasnt to get to enjoy them that night. I got a message from a someone I have been corresponding with saying

"hey lets met and go to a movie tonight"...so I called him back and we decided the 6.30pm movie looked good. It was 5.10pm at this stage and it takes me 35-40 mins to get to the theatre so I was a whirlwind of shower, dress, makeup, ring the Aunty to let her know I have a date, she lives vicarously through me and loves my dating regime, it keeps her entertained for hours lol.

SSooooo anyway I get there 5 mins before the movie starts hoping like hell this guy isnt a total creepo, txt him and let him know I was by the doors and he comes bouncing around the corner with a huge grin looking all cheeky and cute and I am thinking thank god he is smiling thats a good start. People who take themselves seriously all the time I can do without in my flitter fluttery world.

We laughed during the movie, out loud, which is great because so many chuckle but dont actually laugh in case someone hears them, god forbid. I dont, I laugh, laughing is great fun. Then afterwards we went to a cafe and he bought me a hot chocolate and a chocolate afghan biscuit....it was a very cold evening. Talked for ages over our chocolate and then he escorted me to my car and asked if we could meet again when he is back from his business trip at the end of the week.

All in all a lovely evening, glad I decided to go. A very nice guy so far so we will see what happens. We are meeting for a drink after work on friday this week. Watch this space.........

Bachelor Number 2..... If you were taking a lady out to lunch.......

Of which he didnt. I got a last minute cancellation because he had a meeting with his Boss. Flick off or truth??? you decide.
Batchelor Number 3 who wasnt on my current list but someone I spoke to a few months ago who liked what I said about where I lived so much he decided to check the place out and loved it so much he bought a house in the neighbourhood........stalkerish or what?? Called last night to say he has moved in , got all settled in and would I like to catch up for a drink.....So thats tonights agenda.
A drink at the local pub at the local marina, because I live by a Marina of course.

Behind Door Number One...

Uh huh, met the first of the date list.......in the funniest situation ever but I have to give the guy kudos for having balls. Bear with me and you will see why.

On Monday night my girlfriend whom I have known since I was 13 and I went to see 'Train' in concert. As it was not far from my work we decided to meet at a local pub, have a bite and a wee drink and then head on over to the venue. I had purchased 3 tickets and while we thought we had a third person joining us,on the morning of the concert he bailed .....so anyway my friend and I are sitting at the pub chatting, we are both single and using the same dating site...........it was bound to happen wasnt it?!! We compared notes and discovered one of the guys is talking to both of us..........que hilarious laughter at the same lines he is using on both of us. Ok so having had a drink we decided this could be all a bit of time to have some fun.
Out comes the cell phone and said guy "Freddie" is called by moi, who chatted politely for a minute then passed the phone over to my friend who also chatted politely to a very embarrassed "Freddie" , then taking it further and having a spare ticket we say to him, spare ticket here do you want to see this concert with us tonight? He was a very brave, or stupid man because he said yes.
Anyhoo "Freddie" arrived at the pub and as planned beforehand both my friend and I stood up and gave him a peck on the cheek simultaneously, he went bright red and you could see the poor wee souls mind spinning. Much laughter by my friend and I and much blushing and stammering from Freddie ensued. Gotta give the man credit for even turning up, his flatmates had told him he was taking his life in his hands.
We all went to the concert and had a great time, poor "Freddie" looked slightly nervous all night however and he text us both on his way home with the same line yet again ...which made my friend and I laugh even harder at this poor guy as we were on our phones laughing about the whole scenario at the time. I think he had hoped during the course of the evening he was going to get to live some kind of male menage `a trois fantasy. Silly man!
Ok so my friend and I have no interest in "Freddie" at all but it made for a fun story and the concert rocked. I think I might wait for Pat Monahan to divorce his wife and come looking for me now anyway.

Brokering World Peace.

So, back on the dating scene am I. Had a couple if interesting ones, had a couple of truely awkward moments and had some who havent even got off the screen into real life and never will.
No keepers yet! Although one who seemed very sweet by daylight....we walked our dogs on the beach together and he held out his hand to help me over the slippery rocks, such a gentleman, turned into a somewhat beer swilling maniac by night on the second date and then offered the information he drinks too much and this has caused problems in past relationships...........oh great! Why send a cute guy who seems so sweet and lovely, and then slap that into the mix.....thanks universe!!!!!!!
One would think that if you know you do it, and it does get in the way, you would make some effort to STOP!!!

Right now this is what is on offer for me in the way of "lets meet!!" over the next week or so.....

1. A Dr from Jordan.
2. A sweet looking Argentinian Boy who is 17 yrs younger than me. Roarrrr @ me a cougar,too funny
3. An English lad
4. One who says he is Persian but I think he's Indian , whatever!!
5. A Frenchman who is 5 years younger than me....(really this cougar thing is a bit much)
6. An Aussie Bloke (good keen men Aussies) lol
7. A dutch guy (not going to happen)
8. A good old hometown kiwi boy 5 years younger than me (again whats with the young ones wanting to meet me???)

And well I thought maybe I could start a new UN with this lot and broker world peace as an outcome.
So this is me teeing up my social calendar for the next week or so. I havent been this busy since I was ....well much much younger than I am now lol.

All this means I am going to be very coffee'd or in my case tea'd or Wined out by the end of this round.
Still I must not complain when World Peace is at stake. Yeah!

Cinderella wants her Slipper back

Oh My oh my. Senior school ball time over the weekend. My gorgeous son wanted to wear all black and picked out the fabric for mum to make his tie, then it was all "oh mum I need one of those matching pocket hankie thingy's too please. So ok Damn! suit hire is expensive at School Ball time, and there was new shirt, socks and dress shoes of course because when your son lives in jandals , sneakers or soccerboots there is just no need for swanky smart shoes. I owe my wallet an IOU.

So anyway there is Benny all gussied up and looking every bit his age and more and there's mum in the corner with a tear in her eye cause her little man isnt anymore but boy oh boy! he looked so smart.

Normally I dont get to see this, I get the smelly manky soccer gear, jeans that should have been washed a month ago and a bedroom that is a swamphole. To see him all dressed up was lovely. To see the photos taken on the night of all the fun and revellry, even better. Until I got to the 'afterball' party photos. Oh me Oh my.... mum sat there and said not a thing...........I was too damn busy scrapping my jaw off the floor lol. Still it wasnt so bad and he is after all 17 and a boy and there are some things a mum just doesnt need to be so aware of no? ANyway here is Ben looking very smart, and here is on the way to the afterball function.....take note this is on the way to, you dont want to see the pictures from the actual event itself. lol.

All Sunshine and Happiness and little Babies

I went to a Naming Ceremony yesterday. Good friends who live across the road. Their first child and she is the most happy, adorable wee thing. As I stood there listening to Emma's parents pledge their love and support for the rest of their lives it struck me that they were embarking on a journey I started 17 years ago when my son Ben was born. I drifted back to the first moment I held my son after a long and difficult birth that caused some amount of panic at the maternity wing of the hospital and my eyes teared up because I can remember so vividly the awe and wonder and overwelming love I had for this tiny wee thing I held. Right there listening to my friends and watching the people around them who had children at the ceremony, I saw every single Mum and Dad either reach out and put a hand on their child or seek them out with a look that was filled so obviously with the crystal clear memory of their arrival. I watched as Mums and Dads glanced at each other and shared a secret smile, both remembering that magical moment in their lives and I saw Dads take hold of Mums hands and put their arms protectively around their partners waists. I watched a group of people for a moment in time, all flash back to a moment in their lives when it all began for them. The journey of parenthood.
17 years later for me and I have a son who every day in his life does me proud. He works hard to achieve his goals and has the determination and drive to succeed at whatever he desires.
As any parent knows it's not a path of roses and honey but its a path that exceeds all others in satisfaction. Every step they take, every achievement they have and every slip up they make is woven into our hearts with a gossamer thread that is so strong it will never break. Every heartbreak and dissapointment they suffer, we feel it. They are an individual but an intangible extension of us.
So 17 years on my darling son, my heart still bursts with love for you, and although we dont always agree on things I love the adult you are becoming and see in you a young man who takes his responsibilities seriously and who will learn by any mistakes made. I am proud of you and of who you are. You are to me simply the best person in the world!
I still want you to clean up that swamp hole you call a bedroom!!
I love you Ben.