My son doesnt like me very much at the moment, in fact he likes me so little we have decided he should go stay with his dad a few weeks while he gets a grip so to speak.
I wish someone had told me parenting a teen could be so damn hard espescially owithout a man in the house. I guess it wouldnt have made any difference I would have still gone ahead and produced offspring.
It is with mixed emotions I announce that my son passed his restricted drivers licence on Tuesday. While I am proud of him for getting it, it means there is now another level of fear I carry for his safety and wellbeing, now he can legally drive a steel death trap. This is rich I know coming from someone who rides a motorbike, but thats me, thats not my son.
So last night he says to me
"Mum I am just going to go up the road and put gas in the car" (his car which he share/owns with me until he has finished paying me for it) I was all "ok thats fine, be careful sweetheart"
Baring in mind this is the very first time he has driven this car without anyone, anyone being me as I am the one who has been giving him lessons, in the car with him and it is not the car he sat his test in, this car is older and not as easy to drive as the one he sat his test in. I have several cars.
Ok back to the story...
So off he drove to the gas station which is 5 minutes away...............and mother started waiting for his safe return immediatly.....................waited................waited..................waited..............After 40 minutes of waiting I was starting to get nervous and rang his friends place to see if he was there.....no they hadnt seen him, so then I got in the car and drove to the gas station and around the beachfront to look for him. This is after I had rung his cell phone 4 times and text him as well.
Finally as I am heading home 1 hour and 10 mins after he had left to get gas I got a text from him saying he was on his way home.
I arrived home and he had got there before me and as you can imagine I got out of my car and immediately was all " Where the hell have you been? Why didnt you text me or call me when you decided to go to your friends place? Do you not understand I have been sitting here worrying about you? first time, newly licenced, difficult car, yada yada yada" to which I got a very beligerent teenager giving me attitude and talking about having freedom. I asked for the car keys and told him at 17 he was not going to just dissappear without letting me know where, when what time etc. Well!!! he opened his mouth and I am sure at this point a demon had possessed him because the language was vile and the things he said and called me were vile. e.g effing b*tch, Effing take my keys away, eff off and leave me alone you effing b&tch why dont you shut the ef up.
Now I have had to tell him to mind his language a couple of times lately but this was like a torrent released. He was vicious and foul and nasty and I was shocked. I asked him on what level did he think he had the right to talk to me that way and got "dont know" in return. I tried to explain to him he was ONLY 17 and that he had a responsibility to let me know where he was and when he would be home, that he was still in my care and still a minor and that he need not think that because he could drive he was now a man who could do as he damn well pleased. Needless to say I got another earful of vile and by that point decided that as I pay the mortgage and the bills that I had a right to peace in my home and did not have to tolerate the abuse. I made him call his dad to come pick him up.
So I have peace in my home now and the car is locked in the garage and the keys are in my handbag.
The teenage hurricane will not be allowed back into the house until he understands the meaning of respect and can learn to talk without the foul language and that I am the mother and I STILL make the rules. Yes the rules can be negotiated to a point as he matures but I have final say without question and without abuse.
Give a boy a licence and a car and he thinks all of a sudden he is a man and invincible and above boundaries.
Not on my watch he aint!!!!!
