Well, the hot chocolate movie guy (HCM) Guy, we went out on a second date last friday.
It could potentially have been a disaster as we had arranged to met in Sale St a bar in the CBD which is sort of halfway between our respective homes. Traffic was abysmal, I called him at one point to say I was still at least an hour from the venue, he said it was fine his ex was caught in traffic and hadnt picked the kids up yet anyway.
45 mins later he called to say the kids were still there and it looked like he was going to be very very late what did I want to do? I figured I am on the motorway so may as well head up closer to his place and meet somewhere up that way. He felt bad about me driving all that way but sounded pleased I hadnt suggested we call off the date.
So we met at GPK on the North Shore, nice place, I sat in the bar by the fire while I waited for 'HCM guy' to arrive. Half a glass of red later he walked in the door scanning the room anxiously [ I think he was worried I might have given up and gone home]. So we enjoyed another glass of red...this guy used to work in the wine business so he knows his stuff and doesnt skimp on wine. Anyhoo during the course of this glass and conversation in bounced his houseguest, a friend relocating from down south due to work. We shared woodfired Pizza and a bottle of very expensive red wine and then the friend left and we continued conversation and finished off the wine.
The time had come.........I was making noises about heading home and 'HCM guy' invited me back to his for a hot chocolate, now I know this all sounds a bit dodgy but it really is not.
I followed him back to his place wondering if maybe I should be doing this but then thought FFS I am 44 years old I am sure this will be fine, and it was, his house guest made himself scarce when we got there and HCM guy made us both a hot chocolate and we sat and watched part of a movie while we drank and talked a bit more.
Ok by 11.45pm I was starting to fade after having a busy day and what was over a 2 hour drive in totally crap traffic to get to the date earlier in the evening, topped off with a couple of 3 glasses of very nice wine, it was time to leave. So I did. I put on my coat, thanked him for a lovely evening and for dinner and the hot chocolate. I got a split second kiss, the kind that if you blink you will miss it and off I drove into the night with the instruction to text when I had arrived home safely. It took me 40 mins to get home which is about right.
Turns out [in a later text] he wanted to give me a proper kiss good night but had a sore throat and didnt want to share his bug. So two dates down and "the kiss" hasnt happened but that is not a bad thing because after leaping in boots and all with the last boy I am more than a little cautious this time. Once bitten twice shy and all and I am happy just to hang out and get to know this guy first before I open any shutters on the butterflies.
It did make me feel good the other night when he rang and asked when he could see me again and could he cook me dinner this friday.
He cooks, his house is tidy, he is intelligent, he laughs out loud, he is positive, he is driven, and he has a sense of humour and most of all he seems happy to go at my pace.
This could be the start of something good.
Now I have a question to ask.
With things seemingly progressing along with HCM movie guy, do I continue to date other men until something happens or something is said about exclusiveness or is that a bit 'on the nose' Part of me says no I shouldnt I should be concentrating on only HCM guy, but part of me says if it all falls over and things stop progressing I havent cut off other possibilities if I continue to see others. What would your take on it be?
It could potentially have been a disaster as we had arranged to met in Sale St a bar in the CBD which is sort of halfway between our respective homes. Traffic was abysmal, I called him at one point to say I was still at least an hour from the venue, he said it was fine his ex was caught in traffic and hadnt picked the kids up yet anyway.
45 mins later he called to say the kids were still there and it looked like he was going to be very very late what did I want to do? I figured I am on the motorway so may as well head up closer to his place and meet somewhere up that way. He felt bad about me driving all that way but sounded pleased I hadnt suggested we call off the date.
So we met at GPK on the North Shore, nice place, I sat in the bar by the fire while I waited for 'HCM guy' to arrive. Half a glass of red later he walked in the door scanning the room anxiously [ I think he was worried I might have given up and gone home]. So we enjoyed another glass of red...this guy used to work in the wine business so he knows his stuff and doesnt skimp on wine. Anyhoo during the course of this glass and conversation in bounced his houseguest, a friend relocating from down south due to work. We shared woodfired Pizza and a bottle of very expensive red wine and then the friend left and we continued conversation and finished off the wine.
The time had come.........I was making noises about heading home and 'HCM guy' invited me back to his for a hot chocolate, now I know this all sounds a bit dodgy but it really is not.
I followed him back to his place wondering if maybe I should be doing this but then thought FFS I am 44 years old I am sure this will be fine, and it was, his house guest made himself scarce when we got there and HCM guy made us both a hot chocolate and we sat and watched part of a movie while we drank and talked a bit more.
Ok by 11.45pm I was starting to fade after having a busy day and what was over a 2 hour drive in totally crap traffic to get to the date earlier in the evening, topped off with a couple of 3 glasses of very nice wine, it was time to leave. So I did. I put on my coat, thanked him for a lovely evening and for dinner and the hot chocolate. I got a split second kiss, the kind that if you blink you will miss it and off I drove into the night with the instruction to text when I had arrived home safely. It took me 40 mins to get home which is about right.
Turns out [in a later text] he wanted to give me a proper kiss good night but had a sore throat and didnt want to share his bug. So two dates down and "the kiss" hasnt happened but that is not a bad thing because after leaping in boots and all with the last boy I am more than a little cautious this time. Once bitten twice shy and all and I am happy just to hang out and get to know this guy first before I open any shutters on the butterflies.
It did make me feel good the other night when he rang and asked when he could see me again and could he cook me dinner this friday.
He cooks, his house is tidy, he is intelligent, he laughs out loud, he is positive, he is driven, and he has a sense of humour and most of all he seems happy to go at my pace.
This could be the start of something good.
Now I have a question to ask.
With things seemingly progressing along with HCM movie guy, do I continue to date other men until something happens or something is said about exclusiveness or is that a bit 'on the nose' Part of me says no I shouldnt I should be concentrating on only HCM guy, but part of me says if it all falls over and things stop progressing I havent cut off other possibilities if I continue to see others. What would your take on it be?
Oh, he sounds lovely and charming and good. So far, I like him!
ReplyDeleteThis made me laugh out loud: "now I know this all sounds a bit dodgy but it really is not."
As to your question - I never did it right. If I didn't keep seeing other guys, I would get too invested too fast...but if I did keep going on dates I felt like a jerk. I think if you can keep yourself in a good place and let things progress at a reasonable (whatever that means for you) rate and you want to only see him, then maybe that's what you should do? Whatever it is, you have to feel good about it.
Ya I think seeing other guys would not make me feel so good to be honest. I think its the catholic guilt/goodgirl upbringing I had. lol
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